MOTHER RUSSIA

At some point this summer, I came across what can only be described as "the best synthpop/new wave EP of all time." by a Russian band called TESLA BOY. The cover art alone is enough to justify this claim. According to their Myspace page, they have recently finished work on their debut full length which will be out in early 2010. They have just recently released the music video for one of the songs off of their EP. And while I don't think it's the best track, the video is essentially amazing. I'll let it speak for itself. Go find everything you can by this band.

ELECTRIC LADY BY TESLA BOY from FIRMA on Vimeo.

MY GIFT TO YOU.

Ok, it's not really *my* gift. But, if you haven't already heard of them, DELPHIC hail from legendary Manchester, UK. The town that produced the likes of: Morrissey/The Smiths, Joy Division, & New Order among others. That's a serious fucking crowd to hang with. And anyone who knows me knows that those three names happen to also occupy slots on my top 10 artists of all time. Well, with the release of DELPHIC's debut and highly anticipated full length "Acolyte", I am going to have to find someone to bump off the list. Because DELPHIC just gave me an eargasm. For serious. This record honestly fits the bill. And there was no hurry either. These lads took their time with this. Releasing a few singles in 2009, most notably "Counterpoint" which was featured on THIEVES LIKE US Volume 1. So when Acolyte comes out on January 11th, you people had better be in line to get it. I promise it won't disappoint. Here's a teaser:

KRIS KUKSI UPDATE

A few posts back, I mentioned that art of Kris Kuksi. Which is essentially mind boggling. I came across this video, which gives you a more 3-dimensional idea of just how utterly INSANE his sculptures are.

So impressed right now.

Kris Kuksi - "The Plague Parade: Opus 2" Walkthrough from Arrested Motion on Vimeo.

IT CASTS A SHADOW

Last night, it was 7 degrees out. The windchill was -2 due to the 34 mph wind gusts. I rode across town to meet some friends for dinner. It was, to be certain, the coldest bike ride of my entire life. My hands were essentially hypothermic and bordering on frostbitten when I arrived at the restaurant. My body worked so hard so fast to get heat and blood to my extremities that I essentially passed out when I walked inside. It was utterly insane. The best part was that I knew that I had to turn around and ride home. The snot froze to my upper lip, and my skin was on fire by the time I returned home. So serious. Weather like this is definitely grim. It makes you understand how those Norwegians can be so totally evil all the time. This type of weather definitely makes you want to sit inside and listen to dark moody music. Or at least, that's how I get.

Which brings us, dear readers, to the matter at hand. THIEVES LIKE US Vol. 6. I present it to you in all of it's cold, frostbitten glory. 25 tracks to sit at home alone next to the space heater to.

CLICK HERE TO GET THE MIX

TRACK ORDER (by artist):
1] Fever Ray
2] Ulver
3] Kite
4] Assemblage 23
5] Destroid
6] Bella Morte
7] Cold Cave
8] Former Ghosts
9] Monumentum
10] The Mary Onettes
11] The Cure
12] Bauhaus
13] Danzig
14] Gerard McMann
15] Carpathian
16] Gothminister
17] Psyclon Nine
18] Wumpscut
19] Sisters of Mercy
20] Sixx
21] White Lies
22] Editors
23] SunnO)))
24] Joy Division
25] Nine Inch Nails

Oh, and speaking of riding bikes and black metal....in case you missed these....it's pretty great/horrible/hilarious/embarrassing/awesome/awful.

THE FRIGGING SHIELD

OK. I will admit it. I am a climbing addict. I may not be the strongest. Or the boldest. I might not have the greatest climbing blog in the world. But damn it, I love this stuff. I get a little obsessed. A tad wacky perhaps. Fixated. Etc. A couple years back, I saw some footage of Jason Kehl climbing a beautiful face at Little Rock City (now Stone Fort), in Chattanooga, TN. He ended up calling it The Shield, and the bugger goes at V12. It became pretty evident to me straight away that this was a world class beautiful cumshot of a boulder problem. Later on, some Sportiva ads surfaced featuring Kehl on the very climb. The photos made me even more interested. This thing looked freaking amazing. The beginnings of my obsession surfaced around this time. A little later on, rock climbing legend and sexiest man alive John Glassberg posted a video of his ascent of the boulder. That was it. I wanted in. Badly. Maybe it was John's ravishing good looks, and my insane jealousy at my inability to ever be as unstoppable handsome as he is. But either damn way. I needed to climb The Shield. There was just one obvious problem. I live in Boston. The Shield is in Tennessee. Well, this past month I went to the Southeast to see my family (read: TO GET MY HANDS ON THE HOLDS OF THE SHIELD.) So what did I do in the few weeks leading up to the trip? I tried to ignore my back injury and get my finger strength up to par. I closed my eyes at night and saw this freaking boulder in my sleep. Ridiculous.

Day one: Straight from the car ride from Grovetown, GA to the boulder field. Waste lots of times on old favorites like the Cleopatra-Cinderella traverse (v9), Super Mario (v5), Redhouse (v7), Tri-star Crack (v3), Deception (v7), etc. Finally, I work my way back to The Shield. It's really a sight to see. I was a little giddy. I took a snapshot with my iPHONE and sent it to anyone whom I foolishly thought might actually give a shit. (If you were the recipient of one of those picture messages, I'm sorry ok? I WAS EXCITED. WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME????) I toyed around on a couple of the moves. But my companion had to be to work, and I knew that if I sat down to give it real effort, I would not be able to drag myself away. TOMORROW SHIELD. TOMORROW.


Day two: We had to semi-sneak in to the boulder field on this day because a bunch of uptight, elitist hillbilly fucking retards think they own the boulder field. And that's all I'm going to say about that. Warm up. Head straight for it. Not much time today. But amazing temps. Worked out the opening/easier moves in two attempts. One I got in to the crux, I was utterly baffled. I had use a "lifeline" as if I was in some game show to call John Glassberg for some beta. Jesus, old school rock climbing purist types would have been embarrassed to see me on my iPHONE at the foot of the boulder discussing the nuances of a heel-hook versus a toe on the crux move. But you know what I have to say to them? Technology is freedom mother fuckers. It's fall. Decorative gourd season. Now you're either ready to reap this freaky-assed harvest or your not. Get out of the way, I'm trying to find some 3g network service so I can watch the video on YOU TUBE dammit. Must. Get. Beta.

At any rate, I worked out the crux. Which is very, very difficult and involves a long ass throw off a heel hook that is at about chin height. And you're moving in to a completely shitty flat hold. Sweet. A little dismayed at this point, sun was going down and I had not yet stuck the crux.


Day three: After some snow, and fighting through about 3564529812 climbers to get back to the boulder, I much anticipated a send. The conditions were great. If anything, it was too cold. Something asinine like 27 degrees. I made it to the crux with nearly no effort and almost stuck the move my first attempt of the day. I was having a hard time keeping my fingers warm. After a few solid efforts, I was left by myself with just 1 crashpad. A less than ideal scenario for this thing. I eventually stuck the crux move, and nearly did the boulder, only to have my foot pop sending me flinging from the boulder. GAHHHH! NEXT ATTEMPT IT GOES.

I waited too long. 30 minutes of spotting my friend on Deception proved to be too long in the hideous cold. I got back on and it became clear very quickly that I was done for the day. My muscles were utterly and completely frozen.

I admit it, I am an addict. I will buy a plane ticket to bum-fuck USA to climb on a rock. AND FAIL. But is that failure? Is traveling with visions of standing on top of a physical and mental challenge failure? Is it crazy? Am I demon? Etc.

I think not. I'm going back. The Shield will fall.

THE SOUTHEAST IS ESSENTIALLY FUCKED.

Ok. I'm sorry. But seriously? The Southeastern United States is a pretty awful place. I love the climbing there. And I have some dear and sweet friends whom (for reasons beyond my grasp) still reside there. I spent about 10 days kickin' it down there in the "red states". I flew in to Asheville, NC to visit my family. I have to say that Asheville, NC seems like one of the more useless places I have ever been. Then, it was off to Augusta (technically Grovetown), GA to see my favorite family in the universe: The Cones. I got disgustingly and violently ill at their house for 24 hours. I am at least 95% certain that I almost died. Then, it was off to the main event....5 days of climbing (in a row. OOF.) in Chattanooga, TN. Which is decidedly the only place in the Southeast I could even consider living.

My goal: To climb The Shield (V12) at Little Rock City. Or Stone Fort. Whatever the hell they are calling it these days. My secondary goal: to climb the most beautiful lines I could find. More on goal #1 later. For now, let's tackle the pesky business of finding gorgeous rocks to touch.

Right up the road from some of the more well-known bouldering areas is a small satellite area called Pep Boys. This place boasts some of the most incredibly scenic climbing I have seen since the Buttermilks and Rocklands. I crested a hill at one point to see a lone football-shaped boulder leaning right over the creek.

WHOAH.

"Oh dear god that thing had better have climbable features on it.", I proclaimed as I scrambled down the slope toward it. I hopped across the creek on some rocks to arrive at the foot of what is, to be certain, one of the most gorgeous climbs these tired old eyes have ever seen. Not too hard. Maybe V7. But holllyyyyy smokes was it a looker. Three holds to the top. And a big, committing last move. All the while a gurgling creek whooshes behind you. Beautiful.

In almost a hurry to get on this thing.

First move is a really nice drop-knee on subtle feet to cross to the first crimp.

About to set up for the last move to the lip.

There were some great little warm ups and moderates scattered throughout this boulder field as well. Kaleigh had committed herself to a really fun little roof problem with a pretty heinous top out.

Roof!

It seems tall when you're from FL.